10 Weeks Old...What a week!

Well this was it.  The week I'd been dreading since before Griffin was born.  My maternity leave was over.  Of course last week was the fastest week of my life.  I feel like I blinked and it was over.  My emotions started to run wild Sunday night.  I was rocking G to sleep and just lost it.  The tears flowed like rain.  He of course was fine and non the wiser, but I wound up crying myself to sleep that night as well.  Matthew thought I'd officially lost it.  Monday morning rolls around (shortest night EVER) and as soon as I got him out of bed the boo-hooing started all over again.  I wound up redoing my makeup 3 times and decided I needed to take it with me.  Everytime I'd stop crying long enough to touch it up, something would upset me again and it would be all for nothing.  I knew leaving him was going to be hard, but there is honestly no way anyone can prepare you for what it feels like to leave your baby.  Mommy guilt is 100% real.  He may not know the difference but I sure do.  At one point I picked him up from his bouncy seat, and just stood there hugging him and sobbing.  Matthew was finally starting to understand just how hard this really was.  I wasn't just trying to be dramatic, my heart was honestly breaking.  I hadn't been away from him for more than a few hours total since the embryo transfer last April.  To be away from him for 8 hours in one day, and to do that five days in a row seemed like the worst form of torture ever. 

Matthew went with me to drop Griffin off for the first time.  I don't know if I could've done it by myself.  He had to encourage me to leave.  Telling G goodbye was just plain awful.  It's pretty bad when you make the babysitter cry too!  Thankfully she understood it was in no way directed at her abilities to care for him.  When you try as hard for something as we did for Griffin, it just seems wrong to not be with him all the time.  Matthew got me out the door and into my car and we went our seperate ways.  I of course was crying all the way to school.  As soon as I saw the members of my grade level I lost it all over again.  Thankfully everyone I work with has kids too...they get it.  I finally quit crying about 8:15.  At this point it had been pretty much steady for almost 3 hours.  In other words I was a hot mess.  Thankfully the kids didn't seem to notice! 

As the day went on I had pictures and updates texted to me, which definitely helped ease my anxiety.  He was doing great and happy as could be.  He napped well and ate well, so he was clearly not having any problems.  Mommy had the seperation anxiety!  Matthew called me just before lunch and asked if I wanted him to bring me lunch.  I was not about to turn that down so I told him to absolutely come for lunch.  I wasn't paying attention to when he walked into the lounge until I hear everyone go "awwwee!"  I turned around and not only was he carrying in lunch, but he also had a vase full of flowers with him as well.  He almost had me in tears again, but I managed to hold them back amazingly enough.  He earned the husband of the year award for that!  Everyone was pretty impressed by his gesture and thoughtfulness.  The flowers have been sitting on my desk all week and brighten my mood whenever I'm feeling sad and missing my little guy. 

Thursday G turned 10 weeks!  Double digits already!  It really doesn't seem possible.  This time last year we were getting ready to start meds for IVF.  I can't believe how time has flown.  One month from now will be a year since our embryo transfer and our lives changed forever :o)

Well if you hung with me through this marathon post, THANKS!  If you scrolled straight to the bottom for the pictures I don't blame you a bit.  That's the best part of the posts if you ask me!  So without further adieu here are pics from G's first week at the babysitter and turning 10 weeks old!

My first day at the babysitter's

Home after my first day at the babysitter's

Chillin in the Bumbo!

So sleepy...

Such a big boy!  Sitting in his high chair for the first time!

My flowers from Matthew & G on my first day back at work

Two Months!

Well I did it again.  I'm horribly late in this week's post, but here we go anyway.  G was officially two months old on Leap Day!  We had his 2 month well-baby check up that morning.  The pediatrician checked him all out and said he looks great!  He is growing like a weed and his stats keep increasing at a great pace.  He was 12lbs, 22in long and his head was 15 in around now.  Unfortunately the appointment wasn't all fun...of course it also consisted in his first round of immunizations :o(  He was such a trooper though.  He got a total of three sticks, two in the right leg and one in the left.  Thankfully the nurses did the first stick at the same time so the whole process would go as quickly as possible.  His little eyeballs opened up wider than I've ever seen as soon as they stuck him, his face got beet red and then came the wail.  Poor little buddy :o(  They did the last shot and he was already crying so I don't think he really noticed it because he was too busy reacting to the first ones.  haha!  As soon as they were finished I was able to pick him up and snuggle him and he calmed down.  Once I got him all dressed we went out to the waiting room, he ate and then fell asleep.  He slept on my chest most of the afternoon.  If I put him down he'd cry and wimper, so in order to make him feel better we snuggled most of the day.  It's not like it took a whole lot of convincing to get me to agree.  :o)  He's definitely a world champion snuggler!  His poor little legs were so sore the rest of the day.  After waking up from his initial nap I changed his diaper, which normally he enjoys.  Lying on the changing table and wiggling all over is one of his favorite things to do.  Not that day.  Poor little guy just laid there and cried and cried and cried.  Whenever I had to move his legs he'd just cry harder.  I finally broke down and gave him a bit of Tylenol which basically just wiped him out so he could sleep some more.  That night wasn't too horrible, but we were definitely up and down a little more than usual.  At 5am he got more Tylenol and that put him out for a few more hours.  More sleep for Griffin and more sleep for Mommy!  Thankfully the day after he was much better and had returned to his happy little self :o) 

On Friday we went to visit G's babysitter.  Since I start back to work on Monday we took all of his things over to her house so they would be there and ready; less to take on the first day.  It will be hard enough as it is!  I showed her our typical nap time routine, and put him down for a nap while we were there.  Of course he didn't sleep very long, but hopefully he gets used to the new place quickly and doesn't have too much trouble napping.  We had a little playdate with the babysitter's son who is 5 months older than G, so they could start getting used to being together, then it was time to go home.  He was worn out from the busy afternoon and of course fell asleep as soon as we got home. 

We also got to take our first trip to the After-hours Peds office at one of the hospitals in town.  After crying and fussing and being nothing like his usual happy, bubbly self I finally called our pediatrician's office and talked to the nurse on call.  G really is not a fussy baby at all.  If he's fussy and crying he's usually hungry or tired.  We tried all the usual things to try and make him calm down and sleep but nothing worked very well.  Just when we'd get him to sleep and lay him down, he'd wake up crying 20 minutes later.  Once we reached the point where neither of us had any idea what else to do, then we called the doctor.  Of course he fell asleep before we left and slept in the car, his longest nap of the day.  We get to the ped's office and he's smiling and laughing at the nurse.  I'm sure she's thinking these crazy first time parents...this kid is fine!  The doctor comes in and small world, he is our usual pediatrician's brother.  I described the events of the day to him and he tells us it sounds like reflux.  We're wondered about reflux for a while, but it was never bad enough to really do anything about it.  He has started to spit up more often than he used to, and he said the waking up screaming after only a little while lying down is a classic reflux symptom.   We've now elevated the mattress in his crib on one end, have started putting rice cereal into his bottles, and he's napping either in a swing or propped up on a Boppy pillow.  Hopefully all of these things will help and he won't need any kind of reflux meds.  It is something he'll eventually outgrow, but it's definitely a pain right now!  I shouldn't complain though, it could be much worse. 

I've been trying to make the weekend last as long as possible, but unfortunately it seems to be going faster than normal.  My last week at home went faster than any week I can ever remember.  I feel like I went to bed Monday night and woke up and somehow instead of it being Tuesday it was Sunday and my last day at home with my little guy.  I know he is going to be well cared for, but it doesn't make leaving him any easier.  I've only been away from him for about 5 hours total since he was born.  To almost double that amount of time the first day is not an easy thing to stomach.  I never used to think I'd be happy staying home all the time.  I always thought I'd get bored and need something to do, but now that it's time to go back I'm singing a different tune.  Hopefully the first week goes well.  He will have no problem I'm sure.  I, on the other hand, will probably be counting down the seconds until the day is over and I get to see my baby again.  Stay tuned for the report once the first week is completed!

To end this post on a MUCH happier note than all my bellyaching over going back to work...here are some of the pics from this week and G's big 2 month bday :o)

Pre-immunization...

How we spent the afternoon post-immunizations.

My happy baby

Two months old!

8 Weeks!

Wow...I think I say this every time I post, but time really is flying.  Griffin is 8 weeks old!  How in the world is that possible?!  He's smiling all the time now.  If your camera shutter is fast enough you can get a great picture of his adorable little grin.  I've been lucky enough, and really just taken enough pics with my phone to snap a few, in spite of the shutter not being very fast.  I keep telling Matthew a camera upgrade may be in order. 

He's also been giggling more which is just the greatest sound!  He really is such a happy baby.  Aside from getting fussy when he's hungry, and let's face it, don't we all get fussy when we're hungry?!?!  :o)  He's incredibly easy going.  Now we just need to get a full night's sleep!  It's still early, he may not sleep through the night for a while, but his mommy would be SO appreciative if he decided to start that new little trick by the time I go back to work in just over a week.  I have a feeling it probably won't be the case, but a girl can dream. 

This week G and I were on our own for a couple of days.  Matthew had to go out of town overnight for work on Wednesday and Thursday.  I have to say we did pretty well!  It's been nice having M back to relieve me a little bit, but for our first overnight just the two of us, I'd call it was a success!

Next week's big event is his 2 month check up.  That means shots :o(  I am anxious to see how much the little guy has grown since our impromtu visit a couple of weeks ago.  He definitely feels much heavier!  Matthew thinks he's bordering on 12lbs now.  I just can't believe he's almost doubled his weight since birth!  He's growing like a weed! 

Until next time...here is his 8 week picture.  I told you he was a happy boy!

Griffin's Baptism

Sunday was G's big day.  He was baptised at church, and was able to share it with lots of wonderful family!  My parents came over from Indiana, my sister came down from Chicago and my aunt Jean came up from Evansville.  Matthew's aunt, uncle and cousin drove up from Decatur for it as well. 

The weekend started with my birthday on Saturday.  The dreaded Big 3-0.  Thankfully it wasn't as bad as I thought it might be.  We picked my aunt up from the airport, and she got to see our house for the first time.  The last time she was here was our wedding, and we didn't have our condo yet.  It was so nice to spend the day with family and catch up.  For my birthday dinner we all went to a hibachi bar, and it was so much fun!  The food was delicious, and I think everyone had a great time.  Of course they had to tell the waitress it was my birthday so I got the full bday treatment :o)  My very own hibachi chef hat, happy birthday was sung and I the special birthday desert.  We're not excactly sure what that desert was but the whipped cream on it sure was delish!  Lol!  After dinner we went for frozen yogurt.  It was a great way to begin my 30's. 

G's baptism went wonderfully.  He was such a good boy.  Even with the bright lights of the sanctuary shining in his eyes he was good.  He didn't even fuss when the pastor poured the water on his head.  Once church was finished we had a great lunch to celebrate G's special day.  Even though he won't remember it, it was a wonderful memory for Mommy.  A year ago I wasn't sure we would ever have the opportunity to baptize our child.  What a difference a year makes!  He is such a special little boy and we are thankful every day for this amazing little blessing that God has given us!

After our lunch to celebrate G's special day

With Aunt Cindy, his godmother

My 30th birthday dinner

Frozen yogurt...yum!

Way Late...But Better than Never :o)

So I just realized that I never posted the pictures from G's newborn photo session!  We are definitely biased, but I think they turned out amazing!  He did such a great job too.  I can't believe how much he's changed since these were taken.  He's definitely not my tiny baby anymore!

Well there are a few of his newborn pics.  We had a bunch more, but I'm sure this is plenty :o)

7 Weeks Old!

Well here's something new.  This week's post is on time!  G is 7 weeks old today and I cannot get over how fast time is going by.  It really does not seem possible that my baby is almost 2 months old!  Even more unbelievable is how close my maternity leave is to being over.  Two months seemed like a great amount of time until it actually started.  I know once I'm back at work things will be fine, but those first few days are definitely going to be an adjustment. 

The big news from this week was our trip to the pediatrician on Tuesday.  Monday G was very congested and fussy.  He didn't nap well and had a hard time breathing through his nose due to the congestion.  By Monday night he was snorting because he was trying so hard to breathe.  We attempted putting him to bed, but after 15-20 minutes he would wake up crying because he couldn't breathe flat on his back.  This was posing a problem for nighttime.  Matthew and I really did not want to spend all night sitting up in a chair with him.  We decided to try letting him sleep in his swing since he was at a slight incline. Thankfully the swing worked well.  I slept on the couch that night so someone would be near him.  By morning he was still having problems so I called the pediatrician's office and got an appointment for him.  Wouldn't you know by the time we got there he sounded fine and was acting much better.  The doctor probably thought I was crazy, but whatever.  Then nurse went through the typical height and weight measurements.  I couldn't believe what he weighed!  Our little chunky monkey was 10lbs6oz!  I was expecting around 9lbs, not almost 10 1/2!  She putt he heart rate monitor on him to quickly check his pulse and make sure he was breathing fine, which he was thankfully.  The funniest part was his little wrists are too chubby now for it to go around, so she had to put it around his big toe instead. 

When Dr. M came in he checked G over, said his lungs and heart sounded normal, ears looked good, but he could see he was probably congested.  We discussed the possibility of G having reflux as opposed to just a cold.  It's kind of crazy that the symptoms for acid reflux in babies are very similiar to cold symptoms.  Reflux can actually cause them to be congested, which I didn't realize until I started Googling.  He was hesitant to say that G has reflux because he doesn't spit up much and he hasn't had these problems since the beginning.  Typically babies with reflux have problems from birth, and not just all of a sudden.  He did say that the cold could be causing some spontaneous reflux though.  He gave us a couple of suggestions of things to try to see if it improved the symptoms and we'd go over it all again when we're back on the 29th for his 2 month appointment.  Thankfully everything is improving and he is doing much better!  It's a good thing too because we are going to have a very busy weekend ahead of us! 

G's baptism is Sunday so hopefully we have pictures and lots to report after!

As always here is this week's picture!  Little man is getting so much bigger!

I am 7 Weeks Old today!

And for good measure a pic of little man smiling!

5 & 6 Weeks

Wow...I am so behind in my updates!  I guess that's what happens when you have an infant at home :o)  The last couple of weeks have been busy as usual.  G is doing so many new things!  He is smiling in response to Matthew and I now on a regular basis!  He has also almost started to giggle.  He isn't quite there, but it's definitely coming!  He is such a happy little guy and his smile just melts my heart!  We took full advantage of the great weather last week and took walks around the neighborhood.  I think it was probably better for me than him, considering he slept the whole time!  It was definitely nice to be out and getting some fresh air though.  We've gotten so lucky that this winter has been mild.  Hopefully I didn't just jinx us with that statement...

I really can't believe he is already six weeks old.  We have less than a month left before I go back to work.  It's really hard for me to imagine not being at home with him every day.  Even though I'm ready for a break when Matthew gets home in the evenings, I'm still in the house with him.  The longest I've been away from him since the day he was born is three hours, so an eight hour work day is going to feel so long!  We have wonderful child care lined up, and I know he will be in excellent hands, but the thought of all the new things he's going to do, being done for someone else before me just makes me sad.  Thankfully spring break will be right around the corner, so I have that to look forward to once work begins again.  If the weather continues to be good (fingers crossed) then school will be done mid May and we'll have all summer together.  I know that I won't be excited to be back at work, but at least there are vacations on the horizon where G and I will be home together again. 

Here are the pics I have of G at 5 and 6 weeks old.  Gotta love a happy baby!

5 Weeks Old! 

(2.9.12)

6 Weeks Old! 

(2.9.12)